On November 14, 2022, I had my last drink of alcohol. As of writing this, that's 1,303 days ago, over three and a half years, and I have no plans on getting back on that bandwagon ever again.
I'm sharing this because I get asked all the time how I did it, and the honest answer is embarrassingly simple: I read a book.
I loved alcohol
I'm writing this to give you hope. I wasn't one of those "I sometimes drink" casual drinkers. I loved alcohol. By the time I quit I was drinking at least 2-3 drinks a day. So if I could become sober, you most likely can too.
I never woke up wanting to drink. Most mornings I woke up hungover, not wanting to drink, planning on a sober streak sometime in the near future. But around 4-5pm every day that little devil would start to rear its head, pushing me toward that first drink.
And my drinking wasn't sad. It wasn't me by myself drinking just to consume. I was always out at a business event, a dinner, a celebration, a meeting, each one a place where it was socially acceptable to have a drink in your hand. It would have been awkward not to participate. And it was wine, cocktails, craft beers, high end stuff, never just vodka. I didn't have a problem, after all. I also never did anything I seriously regretted while drinking. I never drove drunk, never said something I shouldn't have, never caused harm to others. I didn't really change as a person. So again, the whole alcohol thing, while a lot, never felt out of control.
I started drinking in high school and quickly fell in love. Not just with the way it made me feel, but with the way it tasted, how it kicked off the night, the whole experience of tasting wine, the nights out, the dinners, sampling a handmade cocktail, cheersing, ordering another round, a nightcap when we got home, an aperol spritz on the Med in summer, an IPA while skiing in the winter, popping a cork of champagne to celebrate, drowning my sorrows when commiserating.
The book
I originally heard about it from Nikki Glaser, the comedian, on the Joe Rogan podcast. She talked about how it changed her relationship with alcohol, and something about the way she described it stuck with me. Since then, I've heard a bunch of other people mention it. Once you start paying attention, you'll notice the same names keep recommending it.
That's part of why I'm writing this post. The way I found the book was random. If I hadn't been listening to that specific podcast on that specific day, I might still be drinking. So I want to add my voice to the pile of people who say this book works. If you're curious, just read it.
The book is The Easy Way to Control Alcohol by Allen Carr. Carr is the same guy who wrote the famous Easy Way to Stop Smoking, which has sold over 10 million copies. He took the same method and applied it to drinking.
I'm not going to spoil the book, but I'll tell you what it doesn't do. It doesn't rely on willpower. It doesn't ask you to white-knuckle your way through cravings. It doesn't tell you that you have a disease, or that you'll be "in recovery" for the rest of your life. It doesn't ask you to attend meetings or follow a program.
What it does is something much weirder. It just changes how you think about alcohol. By the time you're done reading, you don't want to drink anymore. Not because you're forcing yourself to abstain, but because the entire idea of drinking starts to feel... silly. Like, why was I ever doing this?
I was skeptical going in. The whole premise sounds too good to be true. "Just read this book and you'll never want to drink again." Sure. But I gave it an honest shot, and it worked exactly as advertised. The day I finished the book was the day I stopped drinking. I haven't had a sip since, and more importantly, I haven't wanted one.
That last part is what people don't believe until they experience it. I'm not sitting around fighting the urge. I go to dinners, weddings, parties, vacations. Other people drink. I don't. I don't feel deprived. I don't feel like I'm missing out. If anything, I feel like I figured out something most people haven't.
What's changed
I'm not going to lecture anyone about the benefits of not drinking. There are a thousand articles, podcasts and videos online about that. But here's what I'll say from my own experience:
I sleep better. I weigh 30 pounds less. I'm in better shape. I have more time. I have more money. I don't have hangovers. I don't lose entire Sundays to recovering from Saturday.
But the biggest thing isn't any of that. The biggest thing is that I just don't think about it. I don't think about whether I'll drink tonight. I don't think about how much I drank last night, or how I'll get home if I'm drinking. I don't think about whether I'm drinking too much, or whether I should cut back, or whether I should do Dry January. That entire mental loop, which I didn't even realize was running in the background, is just gone.
That's the gift of the book. It doesn't just stop you from drinking. It stops you from thinking about drinking.
On the topic of money and calories, I use an app called I Am Sober. It tracks how long you've been sober, and based on your lifestyle, it calculates how much money you've saved and how many calories you've avoided by not drinking. According to the app:
I've saved $78,120 by not drinking.
I've avoided 520,800 calories, the equivalent of about 149 pounds of body fat if you do the math.
The money was never much of an issue, especially for the joy it brought me. But one thing was clear: I was never going to be my ideal weight consuming all those empty calories. It became very clear that no matter how much exercise I was doing, an extra 400 calories a day was a battle I was never going to win, especially as I got older.
Next step
If any of this resonates, if you've ever wondered whether you should drink less, or if you've tried to cut back and it didn't stick, or if you're just curious, read the book. That's all I'd say. You don't have to commit to anything. You don't have to tell anyone. You don't even have to stop drinking while you read it (Carr actually tells you to keep drinking until you finish). Just read it and see what happens.
Worst case, you spend a few hours reading a book. Best case, it changes your life.
It changed mine.